Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
