I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
