Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
He? As in you personified your dick?
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
