I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
they call him Oral-B. enough said
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize