he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize