let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize
