5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
