So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
