hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
