Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
