their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
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I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
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I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
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