I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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