The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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