is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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