the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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