I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
