College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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