Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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