She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
