and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Randomize
