in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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