Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
