All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
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