I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
