Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
