I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize