I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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