It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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