Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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