Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
