so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
