they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
