you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
