Are we in a gay sports bar?
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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