Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
and she was petting her beer can
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I FOUND THE LEGS
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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