Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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