Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize