Pants 0. Shit 1.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize