That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
