Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
