how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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