The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
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I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
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I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny