So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
