Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize