Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
