Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
