SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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