fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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