How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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