hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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